Empyrean Engine

My weight is down again. And not just down. I'm at 388 lbs which is lower than my lowest point so far. I successfully broke that nasty plateau. I'm hoping it's all downhill from here. When I do my weigh-ins, I know I've mentioned that I step on and off the scale many times until I see three of the same number (generally in a row). Today it had stopped on 387.8 lbs a couple of times. This is how I know that 387 lbs is just around the corner. Perhaps that will be tomorrow's weight. I don't know. Starting weight:  415 lbs Current weight:   388  lbs  ⇩  Long-term Goal:  145 lbs Short-term Goal:  359 lbs So I read more about that one person's thoughts on the set-point theory; they believe it is incorrect, or, in the very least, not whole. While there are some good points presented by the writer, there are a few glaring problems. I don't profess to be an expert, but I think I have a fairly good mind about things. I won't say that I'm absolutel...

My weight is headed in the right direction today, but I am still almost a pound above my lowest point. I seem to be hovering in the vicinity of 389 lbs right now. I would like to see 388 lbs again. I think that goes without saying. I said it anyway. It's just how I do. I was reading a blog from another person who had interesting thoughts about set-point theory. They contend that what we theorize about a set point is not correct, or that it is, at the very least, only part of the whole story. I'm still researching it myself. I was investigating the plateau issue when I found it, and when I know more, I'll write about what I've learned. Until then, if this is working for me, ad it appears to be for the most part, then I shall continue on this path for the nonce. Starting weight:  415 lbs Current weight:   389  lbs  ⇩  Long-term Goal:  145 lbs Short-term Goal:  359 lbs I'm not hungry. That's a good thing. I have spent an inordinate amount of time...

I didn't fare so well against the pizza monster today. The scale showed 389.2 lbs. To be honest, I expected a bigger up-blip because of my poor dietary choices of late. But today I had a few bread twists. They had Parmesan and garlic butter on them. I couldn't resist, and I had, like, 4 of them. They weren't large, but I had many more calories than I needed. Weekends are the worst! Starting weight:  415 lbs Current weight:  389.2 lbs  ⇧   Long-term Goal:  145 lbs Short-term Goal:  359 lbs It's Thursday night. It's my weekend. It's game night. The deck is stacked against me. I have all manner of excuses, and none of them are good. Today is just one day. Tomorrow I will do better. 'Cause tomorrow's another day  And I'm thirsty anyway  So bring on the rain ~ Bring On The Rain, Jo Dee Messina So let me just go over all of the thiings I ate today. I'm doing this for me. I need to feel the whole shame of what I did to myself. And ag...

I seem to be holding steady at 388.6 lbs from yesterday to today. That's good news, actually. I feel like I overate a bit yesterday. I'm still feeling full right now. I served a full plate of food -- the amount I used to eat before SLD -- and I was able to eat the vegetables, nibble the meat, and eat a couple of spoonfuls of the macaroni and cheese before I was sated. I didn't stop there, though. I ate a bit more meat -- it was just so good! Then I felt miserable for a few hours. How on earth did I ever consume so much and think it was not a lot? I'll never know the answer to that riddle. Starting weight:  415 lbs Current weight: 388.6 lbs Long-term Goal:  145 lbs Short-term Goal:  359 lbs If that wasn't enough, I also had about a 1/2 cup of ice cream. I wanted it. I didn't need it. I felt so gluttonous. Why did I do it? I wasn't hungry. The oil was working. My appetite was suppressed. I just wanted to taste some ice cream. That's where I stop...

I am still on my way down to my goal, and that means I'm still under the short-term goal of 389 lbs that I achieved yesterday! Yay! I promised photos, and they are in this post. Scroll down, but be prepared to see a very large person. I'm still nearly 400 lbs. The important thing is that I can definitely see a change in my body from 10 lbs ago. It's subtle, but it's there. Starting weight:  415 lbs Current weight:   388.6  lbs  ⇩  Long-term Goal:  145 lbs Short-term Goal:  359 lbs I may still be huge, but I'm happy. I'm happy because I'm losing this weight, and I will achieve my life goal of being a normal sized human. There are things I want to do that  can't do because I am not yet normal-sized. For example, I hate roller coasters, but I may just ride one now that I will be able to get into a car and fit the bar over my lap. I will have a lap! OMG! I just thought about that. I had one once. it disappeared. I will have one again. There...

Woo! Another short-term goal achieved! I'm at 389.4 lbs today!! Goodbye plateau, hello downward slide! I'm confident it will continue downward now, and I'm setting the new short-term goal at 359 lbs. That seems reasonable and very achievable, but it's a weight I've only heard of in legends and folklore. Starting weight:  415 lbs Current weight:   389.4  lbs  ⇩  Long-term Goal:  145 lbs Short-term Goal:  359 lbs I accidentally ruined my 2-hour window last night while cooking brinner. I had taken my oil, and I was 15 minutes into my flavorless following hour when I started cooking so that we could eat once the hour was over. Then it happened. I tasted the meat! It wasn't a huge bite. It was a tiny crumble of the taco meat I was preparing for the burritos we were about to have. I had over-seasoned it a bit before, and I wanted to make sure it wasn't over- or under-seasoned this time. I didn't even think about what I was doing. I tasted it, and it...

Today is much better than yesterday, I'm glad to report. I saw 390.8 lbs on the scale, and it's only a matter of time until I see the sweet 389 lbs I want to get to. Short-term goal, here I come! I haven't been to see the porcelain fairy to drop off any treasure in the past few days. I bet that's part of my problem. It's brewing. I can feel it. As silly as it may sound, I think I haven't been eating quite enough to make me need to drop off treasures to the fairy on a daily basis. It's more like every 3 or 4 days. I suspect that I will have a dramatic "whoosh" downward when it happens. Starting weight:  415 lbs Current weight:   390.8  lbs  ⇩  Long-term Goal:  145 lbs Short-term Goal:  389 lbs I much preferred the original trajectory I was headed in from Day 31 to Day 32; it had me on track to weigh less than 365 lbs by the end of this 30-day period. It would have had me at 365 lbs on Day 46. Clearly not a realistic goal seeing as I dropp...

I am up by just under a pound from yesterday. This is a plateau. I wish I could say that I enjoy plateaus. I can't. I don't. This is not defeat, though. I have learned that plateaus are very temporary, and I am fully confident that I will eventually move past it. I was wondering, though, if I am somehow subconsciously sabotaging things. I set these short-term goals for myself -- 404.8 lbs was an undocumented first goal, and then 399 lbs, and now 398 lbs -- and at each one, there's a plateau just before I hit it. I wonder if I'm doing this to myself on some subconscious level. I'd like to get more data before I make the determination on this. It was pretty smooth sailing going down, down, down until I was at 390 lbs, and then progress plateau'd. Now the odd thing is that these short-term goals I set are not at any one specific interval; they vary. This is the reason I think it has to be something I'm doing subconsciously. Only time will tell. Starting w...

The stupid, mean, ugly pizza monster didn't get me last night. I'm safe! I didn't lose much weight, though. I was at 390.8 lbs yesterday, and today I am at 390.6 lbs. At least it's not a gain. That's the good news. I still feel like I overate a bit. I typically skip my "lunch" meal during the week. On weekends, I get confused about mealtimes because I don't maintain my regular sleep cycle. I had a half of a burrito (I made amazing burritos), and then several hours later at the usual brinner meal time, I had a half of a chicken salad sandwich. Starting weight:  415 lbs Current weight:   390.6  lbs  ⇩  Long-term Goal:  145 lbs Short-term Goal:  389 lbs It's not too big hurdle. It's not a hurdle at all. In fact, I'm down by 0.2 lbs. It's not ideal, but it's also not unexpected. My goal of 389 lbs will simply need to wait another day. Plateau graph:

It's the weekend for me. I have succeeded in thwarting the nefarious pizza monster, but tonight is yet another game night, and I need to stand my guard. Maybe tomorrow I will meet the new short-term goal of 389 lbs. Wow! To be in the range of 380 lbs after spending so many years above 400 lbs is so surreal. And while I'm a long way from svelte, I am looking so good in comparison to when I started this diet. There is a very clear difference in the shape of my body, and I have so much energy! I love it. It can only get better. Starting weight:  415 lbs Current weight:   390.8  lbs  ⇩  Long-term Goal:  145 lbs Short-term Goal:  389 lbs Those numbers amazing. Once I hit 398 lbs, I plan to set the next short-term goal at -30 lbs, 358 lbs. That goal is astounding to me, but it seems totally achievable! I can do it. When I hit it, I will have lost over 50 lbs in total. I want to see that happen, and I am fully confident that I can meet the challeng...

It would appear that I have lost two pounds since yesterday. I think it may be some water weight in addition to a visit to the porcelain fairy that contributed to me losing double what I had expected. I'm fine with that; trust me! This is a good thing, and I don't mind repeating this -- daily -- for the next, say, 125 days. Heh. If I lost 2 lbs a day over 125 days, that would be 150 lbs gone. It's impossible, but a girl can dream! I expect a bounce back or plateau day, but I'm okay with that. I want to try to average a pound a day for as long as I can. As I slim down, though, losing a pound will get harder and harder. I'm fully prepared to accept that. Starting weight:  415 lbs Current weight:   391.8  lbs  ⇩  Long-term Goal:  145 lbs Short-term Goal:  389 lbs That short-term goal is just around the corner. It's been over a month, and I'm still so astonished that this is working at all, let alone that it's working so amazingly well. I don'...

Where does the fat go when you lose weight? I posed this question to my hubby. I was met with this pithy, monosyllabic response: Away. That helps. It helps in the not-helping kind of way. So I had to find out because I've lost 21.3 lbs so far, and all of that, I'm sure, is fat. Where did it disappear to? I see that it's gone, but I can't fathom to where. This was bothering me a bit. I thought, "maybe if I know where it goes, I can help it get there faster. It couldn't hurt." So I researched it. I love researching things. I love learning things. I love knowing things. Now I know. C 55 H 104 O 6 +78O 2  —> 55CO 2 +52H 2 O+energy It's chemistry! Fat in => Carbon Dioxide, water, and energy out. This I can understand. This makes sense to me. Now I know. I feel better. I mean, I already feel amazing having lost over 20 lbs, but I feel even better now! Is that possible? I think I just found out that it is! Starting weight:  415 lbs Curr...

Down, down, down. I like it! I'm so excited! I'm barely eating, and I'm fine with that. I'm not feeling the least bit deprived. And when I do eat past the point of satisfied, I feel immense guilt. The only problem I have with this is that the point of satisfaction is, like, two bites into a really delicious meal. The hilarious thing, though, is that since I am eating so little now, our house is overrun with food! We can't get rid of it all! Last night, for example, I made our brinner and served a plate for me and a plate for my hubby. He ate all of his, but I left about half of mine as per my usual habit. I put Saran wrap over the plate, and he went to put it in the refrigerator. He started laughing as soon as he opened the door. He said to me, "this is getting ridiculous," and I knew exactly what he was referring to. There were plates similar to that one in the refrigerator already. I haven't had a chance to eat the leftovers! I need to stop mak...

My set-point must have just lowered while I was showering. Yesterday I'm sure it was above above 396 lbs. And I know it was below 398 lbs. I just woke up from my regular 8-hour sleep at around 6:20 PM. My alarm usually goes off at 6:30 PM. I felt hungry when I woke up, but I didn't yesterday. Today's hunger was light and manageable, and I thought to myself that if my weight drops even lower before my set-point does, I will feel hungrier. I've learned that taking a small bite of something fixes this hunger, so I was considering trying that. The only trouble is that I need a one-hour flavor-free window before taking my oil, and there was less than an hour before I had to leave for work. That's fine because the oil dose would also quell the hunger monster. Then I hopped in the shower. Starting weight:  415 lbs Current weight:   395.4  lbs  ⇩  Long-term Goal:  145 lbs Short-term Goal:  389 lbs My weight is down from yesterday which is fa...

I was a bit hungrier than usual last night when we had brinner. Even though I still didn't eat as much as I used to (not by a long-shot), I feel like I over-ate just a bit. I had a 2 oz piece of meatloaf; two slices of sourdough bread with butter, garlic and cheese; and a quarter cup of mixed veggies with 1 tsp butter and some Season All. I feel guilty that I ate so much. I logically know that this is not a lot, but psychologically I feel absolutely piggish considering I've been eating about half or less than this amount for the past couple of weeks. Starting weight:  415 lbs Current weight:  397.6 lbs  ⇧   Long-term Goal:  145 lbs Short-term Goal:  389 lbs And from the look of my scale, it's hard not to notice that it went up a little. And it's hard  not to   think it's because I was a pig. Speaking of my eating habits, though, I'm a bit concerned that my eating of late hasn't been healthy because of how little I actually consume. My hus...

I have been concerned of late about the loose skin issue following the expected dramatic weight lost. I have been searching the Internet to try to locate articles, opinions, discussions, anything that may allay my fears. What I want to see is success. I want to be assured that eventually, given time, the skin will snap back on its own without the need for body contouring surgery. The prospect of having any kind of surgery is terrifying to me. Starting weight:  415 lbs Current weight:   396.6  lbs  ⇩  Long-term Goal:  145 lbs Short-term Goal:  389 lbs On a lighter note -- quite literally -- the lowest measurement I saw on my scale today was 396.6 lbs. What I usually do is take a measurement at several points during the day. I step on and off the scale several times during these measurement points. The weight  measure that comes up the most often -- and generally at least three times in a row -- is the one I stick with for that measurement...

Woo! I did it! I achieved my first short-term goal! The scale said 399.2 lbs three 3 times in a row. I'm so excited about this. I'm under 400 lbs! It's only slightly under, and there's a good chance it will go back up a bit for a day or so, but I'm taking it. I hit the goal, and it is a confirmed 399.2 lbs! I had to step on and off the scale many times to be certain, but three times in a row is three times in a row! Starting weight:  415 lbs Current weight:   399.2  lbs  ⇩  Long-term Goal:  145 lbs Short-term Goal:  399 lbs Time to make a new short-term goal. I think 10 lbs is reasonable, so I plan to try getting under 390 lbs. New goal: 389.9 lbs or under. Incidentally, 389 is what I weighed when I was a freshman in high school. How amazing is that? I'm 10 lbs away from weighing what I did about 25 years ago! I'm just glad it's not going to take another 25 years to get back down there. My first 30 days on this SLD diet is almost up. I have ac...